Dear Fanfiction Writers
by KittyRin
Summary: The characters all decide to write letters to the Merlin fans expressing... some of their concerns. Only very strange humor.
1. Arthur

Hey! Here's my newest little thing I've been working on. Nothing much has to be said, except that you naturally cannot take any of what the characters say seriously. ;) Don't listen to their nonsense, and just rock on!

**WARNING**: The following chapters will contain major spoilers from all the seasons (up to serie 4), allusions to some sexual content and they might bash some of the shippings. But don't take anything seriously. Also, these little chapters contain weird, weird humor. You have been warned.

I do not own Merlin, (sad face)

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1. Arthur

_Dearest Fanfiction Writers,_

_It is I, King Arthur Pendragon, who writes to you all on this day. Although it is generally accepted that you all possess some kind of glorious literary talent, it has come to my attention that you have begun to write very strange tales. Do not confound my words- that is the last thing I desire. Your efforts, on my behalf, in recording the wonders of my life have been a success! However, some have decided to clearly break some of the unwritten laws about me. This is the ground on why I am writing to you all. Please be attentive when I say this:_

_-I, Arthur Pendragon, am not a donkey. All the anecdotes about me ever being one are false, or I was clearly under a spell. Also, I do not bray. Ever.  
_

_-I do not pout. I am a respectable king and I have had it with everybody describing my supposed pout. I am not a pouter*!_

_-Since you all are my royal subjects, I would most appreciate if you would respect me as your King and stop calling me a prat (and even more a royal prat). My once supposed 'arrogant nature' is in the past, and we all know it was simply the honor of a knight._

_-I AM FIGHTING FIT. Don't you ever dare replace that i with an a._

_-And yes, I know I am unbelievably lucky. I realize that every time Camelot is under attack and I am mortally injured, I somehow manage to kill the enemy, just like that, magically. But that is because I am a fit and STRONG knight!_

_-But finally, I would like to point out to the stories of a most disturbing nature. I am not gay. And especially not with Merlin, for God sake! That boy is an idiot, and were I gay, I would have a better choice in my partner. I am a married man and it is simply horrifying to see how many stories are out there about my supposed endearment to my manservant... I mean, it's Merlin! That clumsy idiot who sleeps around all day!_

_Thank you for your attention. You can go back to whatever foolish trickery you were doing,_

_Arthur Pendragon._

**X**

There is much noise when the letter is finally published.

Everyone gathers around the piece of paper, as a lot of muffled noises echo in the long hallway. However, it is Merlin's voice that is the loudest of them all: he can simply not stop laughing! Will Arthur _ever_ change?

He can picture it clearly: Arthur's hand covered in ink as he scribbles violently over the parchment, his mouth pouting and his eyebrows frowning severely.

The thought of this makes him snicker under his breath.

"MERLIN," A voice echoes through the whole castle. "MERLIN, COME AT ONCE."

The manservant does as he is told, and arrives in Arthur's chambers. He finds Arthur, stuck in a closet.

"Merlin, is that you?" Arthur says. "Come on, don't just stand there you idiot. Get me out of this bloody closet."

_"Oh."_

* * *

;) hehe.

*he, yes that's a word I made up. :P ARTHUR IS SUCH A POUTER!

(and by the way, we all know that Arthur is still in denial. Typical.) Next one is Morgana! 8D

By the way, I'm thinking of doing: Arthur, Morgana, Gaius, Gwen, Lancelot, Merlin, Uther, Gwaine(love) ... if you see anymore characters you'd like to see me write about, I do take requests/suggestions. :)

- KittyRin ^^


	2. Morgana

I do not own Merlin.

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2. Morgana. 

_Dear Fanfiction Writers,_

_Your witty tales have entertained me, I must say. However, I must also confess that you all have portrayed me as some kind of sadist who enjoys nothing but eating little children alive. While I am happy that you do portray my evilness, I would like to point out that I do care for some like, for example, my sister Morgause._

_Also, please, quit saying I smirk every time I say something. I only smirk when I have an ulterior motive to something, and thankfully for Camelot, that's not the case in every word I utter._

_And now, more importantly, I would like to say this: I will never sleep around with the following:_

_-Arthur: What kind of sick people are you all? He's my half brother. And I loathe him to the point that I wish he would burn with his lungs sticking out._

_-Gwen: Though I did use to cherish Gwen as a friend, she is now nothing but an enemy. She's weak, stupid and too emotional._

_-Merlin: Out of all, he's the most unlikely one. That man is nothing but a traitor, and one day, he will suffer at my hands the consequences._

_-Gwaine: Where you find all these men is beyond me._

_-Lancelot: Again, same thing as above._

_And now, I command you to stop writing such foul content, and if you dare not listen, you can expect your meal to be your last. *smirks*_

_Not yours in any way,_

_Morgana Le Fay, priestess of the Old Religion, witch and sorceress of dark magic._

**X**

A loud cry erupts as one of the writers reads the letter.

"Oh no! I shall never eat again!" He cries out, his hand on his heart as he looks around the room in a dramatic way.

"What? Why?" Merlin asks, his voice full of concern.

"Did you not read, Merlin? Morgana Le Fay said that if I eat a meal, it shall be my last... she smirked Merlin! She SMIRKED." He falls to his knees, sobbing. Merlin has an urge to whack the man on his head, but it is Arthur who is the quickest. He slams his fist violently into the writer's face.

"Get a hold of yourself, old man! You're safe here. Morgana will not touch you here..." Arthur promises. The writer thanks his King, calling him every gracious word he can find. Arthur, who has now lost his patience, pushes the man back and yells. "But if you dare write anything concerning me with Morgana, I will have you tortured and burned alive!"

With that, Arthur turns on his heel and walks away. The writer sobs some more in a frightened manner, and Merlin wonders what on Earth is happening to this castle.

* * *

There you go. ^^ Thanks to everybody who reviewed last time! It really means a lot! Someone told me that I should write a letter from Arthur's cat's point of view(from the original legend)? Except I didn't find any site that said he owned a cat... So if you could post the link? :)

Heh. I actually love some of the couples T_T meany Morgana. :P Anyways, next one shall be LANCE-LOT. :) Actually, I could use some suggestions on him, but you're not forced to do anything... but if you can, it would be lovely to post some ideas for me... :P because there is little to write for Lancelot... because he has such a gentle soul...

ROCK ON! KittyRin.


	3. Lancelot

Egh egh egh. This letter feels all awkward. Because Lancelot is such a sweety-pie, it's hard to make him reproach anything from anyone... *_* Thanks to everybody who reviewed/favorite/alerted this!

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3. Lancelot_  
_

_Dear Fanfiction Writers,_

_Your tales on my behalf have been a true wonder... I have enjoyed reading every single one of them! I am afraid you have promoted me to a rank that I do not deserve. After all, I am nothing but a humble man whose goal is to help people._

_It is sad, however, to also notice that some have undermined me to a part that tares my heart apart._

_Please, the only person I shall ever love on this planet is Guinevere, even if my lady has ceased to love me in this way. I shall never love another, and especially not a man._

_And most importantly, please stop using me in order to get Gwen and Arthur to woo each other passionately. I am most happy for both of them, but to put me in such a position gives me sorrow and a sort of awkwardness..._

_I was forced to come back from the dead in order to do evil deeds, which I am not proud, and I fear I have lost my honor. However, please don't make me look even worse and transform me into some kind of monster who has eyes only for Morgana or is ready to kill Arthur in order to get Gwen back. _

_I do realize that I was put into the scenario when it was convenient, and that does grief me, but I shall stand with honor knowing my duty was always to Camelot._

_Thank you for your time and your consideration,_

_Lancelot Du Lac_

_PS: ALSO, I AM NOT A CONFUSED EMO. :'(_

**X**

Everyone feels awfully bad for having hurt sweet Lancelot, even Morgana. They cry true tears because it is not fair and he has suffered so much already.

"Maybe we should let him rest in peace..." The 1st writer suggests.

"But...but! What about his impossible love with Gwen? We cannot let this go unnoticed!" A 2nd writer yells.

"You two do realize I can hear everything you're saying... right?" Queen Gwen asks, her face amused. The two writers run away, frightened.

"Hey Arthur! Did you know that Lancelot's full name has a meaning in french? In fact, it means _spear-lot of the lake_!" Merlin bursts out after a long moment of silence. He seems all proud.

Arthur rolls his eyes, "Of course, Merlin, you _idiot_. Any two year old could have told you just as much!"

Things in Camelot will never change.

* * *

Well, slight exaggeration here. Still feels awfully awkward. UGH UGH UGH.

anywho, next one shall be old and friendly Gaius ! 8D if you have time, leave a little pretty review? :) They really make my day! ^^

KR.


	4. Gaius

I do not own Merlin...

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4. Gaius

_Dear Community of Fanfiction,_

_I write to you all to put an admiration on all the work you've done. It's more than I have ever accomplished!_

_However, I have some concerns._

_I know I have been told before that I trust too easily. But really, there is no need for you to write me like I'm some kind of blind idiot who gives everybody who enters the poison they desire in order to murder Uther, or Arthur or even Merlin!_

_And while I was myself a lady killer when I was younger, I do not really date anymore. And if I do, I do with young women of my age. *_

_And finally, I am neither Gandalf nor Dumbledore. I don't think a beard would suit me. Think of me as... Batman's assistant, Robin._

_Sincerely,_

_Gaius._

**X**

Everyone is very confused by this new letter. They all wonder who is Robin, Gandalf and Dumbledore. Has Gaius finally gone mad?

"Ha! Finally someone who's recognized us for our true value!" A writer exclaims.

"Yeah! All he does is blindly trust people and save people while we write legendary tales!" Another writer says.

"And now, on to get some poiso-I mean potion from him so we can kindly make a soup for our dear Arthur." A disguised third writer (Morgana, in fact) smirks.

* * *

*see the contrast there? eh eh eh? okay, sorry. :P

Okay I feel like I'm just writing rubbish with many inside jokes that nobody understand... :P

next... UTHER! 8D (heck I'm looking forward to this!) Please review if you liked/hated it! ;D


	5. Uther

**Warning**: contains some more mature content.

I do not own Meeeerliiin, or as Arthur likes to call it: Idiot. ;P

* * *

5. Uther_  
_

_DEAR FANFICTION WRITERS._

_This is an official letter from your King, Uther Pendragon, and you are all 'kindly' forced to read this._

_I, Uther Pendragon, am scandalized! I have read some of your so-called stories, and this is preposterous!_

_I am no sadist, all I have ever done was in the hope to get rid of the evil magic that roams around Camelot! It is not my fault if I had to kill the last unicorn because it was secretly a sorcerer in disguise! And those thousands of druid children had to be drowned because they deserved it! THEY WORSHIPED THE DEVIL._

_And alright, although I do agree that I sometimes lack in showing some affection to my son, may I remind everyone that I am not a bad parent! There's just a bit of a bad communication between us, nothing more. (and by the way, this is a private matter that you people should not get involved with in the first place! BEGONE from my sight! Wretched blasphemers!)_

_I am not in love with Morgana, thank you very much. She is my daughter. Besides, she ripped my heart out of my body and broke it in million of pieces!_

_And, finally, if anyone dares mention the troll incident or as some like to call the 'ew-you-shagged-a-farting-tree-trunk incident', I will personally make sure you burn to the stake, not before going through hours of torture._

_This is an order. I will show no mercy._

_KING Uther Pendragon._

_PS: Yes, I am dead. But we still have messengers up there. So beware for I am watching your every move!_

**X**

Everyone shivers as they read the letter, gulping...

"Oh my! What a liar!" One very brave but foolish writer exclaims. Everyone gasps. "He killed my pet rat for no reason, accusing it to be a sorcerer... how can he say he doesn't see witchcraft everyw-aaaaaah!"

The writer is taken away, never to be seen again.

Everyone knows better than to defy Uther, even Arthur, who had secretly posted a story about Morgana and Uther doing... some magic in the royal bedroom.

* * *

Uh-ho. I did not just write that. -shakes head to get thought out of the mind- GAAAH.

Anywho... poor pet rat :( Leave a little comment please, it's only one clickey away :) and next one shall be gwen (gah, going to be so hard. AGAIN - ideas are more than welcome!) Thanks to Trouble in the Night for pointing out that Uther would not say something like 'Sod off' ... :P

KittyRin


	6. Guinevere

EEECK. Well this is awkward. anyways I do not own Merlin...! D:

* * *

6. Guinevere

_Dear writers of fanfiction,_

_Well, I guess I should start somewhere._

_Okay so. Please stop calling me a... lady that provides pleasure to men. I am no sex slave. I know that the scenarist, I mean er... my heart chose to make me emotionally attached to many, but I was now settled. Please forget I ever kissed Merlin, got hit on by Gwaine, loved Lancelot. Because I love no man but Arthur._

_And I know that I can be a bit insecure at times. And that it's really cliché to see the servant that fell in love with the future king... but I saw more into Arthur than you may ever imagine..._

_Also, I think I owe some kind of clarification for the whole Lancelot kiss incident... As some may know, I was under a spell. I would never, ever dare to cheat on Arthur. He means too much to me. _

_So, I know I go against Merthur, which apparently is a big thing for you all. And I'm sorry, but please don't use me in all of your stories and turn me into some kind of evil girl who hates Merlin. Because Merlin is my dearest friend. And Arthur is my husband. _

_Oh, well, this is slightly awkward._

_Just continue writing what you write and I will... leave._

_Yours truly,_

_Guinevere Pendragon  
_

_PS: I also don't love Morgana._

**X**

Everyone stares at Queen Gwen from that moment on.

For some, it is because they loathe her for mentioning the impossibility of Merthur (which they continue to write in any case).

But for most, they now are all attracted to her and wish to seduce her.

"Oh for the love of Camelot! Will they stop harassing her?" Arthur yells out one fine morning.

"Daddy," his youngest daughter says. "I just read shomething fewshy about you and mummy... doing shomething in de bedroom..."

"..." Silence. Well this certainly was _awkward_.

* * *

He. He. OH. Okay, I don't know what's gotten into me lately... -_- anwyays, next one is GWAINE! (hehe, looking forward to that one... x3) You can leave a review to tell me how much you hated this chapter... :( JUST GO, I WONT STOP YOU. And I know, an update so fast...? Well I was bored. So yeah. :)

KittyRin.


	7. Gwaine!

Warning: DOCTOR WHO REFERENCE FOR THE FOLLOWING LETTER THING. ;D (explanation for those who don't know who the Doctor is: he's the awesome dude who can travel through time in a giant blue box. Okay? 'nuff said.)

I do not own Merlin, nor the references to Doctor Who and Shakespeare!

* * *

7. Gwaine

_Dear Fanfiction Writers,_

_You write like Shakespeare... Truly divine._

_I have nothing to say to you all, really, except that you need to keep providing that wonderful work you've been doing._

_I care not what you make me to be... because it's always EPIC. I appear to always to be completely drunk, in love with Merlin and with awesome hair. But I care not._

_And I know, ladies, that my hair sweeps you off your feet. Because it is amazing._

_And why, you wonder, am I talking like I've just stepped out of a party from the 21st century? Well, what if I told you I was actually the Doctor. OH YEAH. THAT'S RIGHT._

_Yours forever, ;)_

_Gwaine_

**X**

"I love you Gwaine!" A fangirl/writer screams as she begins to write how a mysteriously similar looking OC* who was perfect had married Gwaine.

"NO, I love you more!" Another one says, and they begin to fight. Arthur watches with interest because this is a girl fight, after all.

"Okay, you girls... I have to confess something... _Gwaine is wearing a wig_." Someone blurts out.

"Huh?"

"What?"

"_NO_! Reputation, reputation, _oh_ I have lost my reputation!" Gwaine cries, putting his hands dramatically in the air.

* * *

*OC= other character. I am quite obviously referencing to Mary-sues, erm erm./ and haha, lol. Gwaine's was so fun to write. SHAKESPEARE QUOTE. ;) Next is Kilgharrah ! D: This is becoming less and less intellectual and more and more... oh I don't even have a word to describe what this is. Crack. I suppose.

-KittyRin


	8. Kilgharrah

I do not own Merlin.

* * *

_Dear Fanfiction Writers,_

_It is I, Kilgharrah, who writes to you. You may be wondering how does a dragon even have the ability to write. Well, I'm a special creature. With magic._

_It has come to my attention that I happen to always speak in a metaphorical way with many riddles. That is true, I do not deny this. However, do not take me for some half-witted fool. I am a dragon; I do not cross-breed with other creatures._

_I am the Great Dragon, not the Slash Dragon. All the metaphors I have given to Merlin about being the other half of a coin is but the truth. But does this path they walk together really need to be of a romantic nature? Their friendship is what binds them together, as they have a stronger bond than love. It is Destiny._

_Thank you for your attention,_

_Kilgharrah._

**X**

Everyone stares at the letter. How _does_ a dragon even write?

"Merlin, what did he mean by Destiny?" Arthur asks, frowning.

"Oh nothing Sire." Merlin mumbles. He cannot tell Arthur all about his destiny to protect him. That he is his guardian angel. So, he just smiles sheepishly, assuring his friend that the dragon must have lost his mind.

"But," Arthur begins, "I thought I had killed this dragon? That is what you assured me after the battle..."

Merlin laughs nervously. Oops.

* * *

Thanks so so so much to everybody who reviewed last time! 46 reviews... wow, I never expected so much. Thanks guys! Next one shall be Sir Leon. ^^ Please review for any suggestions and till next time... ;)

-KittyRin


	9. Leon

I do not own Merlin, BBC does!

* * *

9. Sir Leon_  
_

_Dear Fanfiction Writers,_

_This is Sir Leon, one of the finest knights in Camelot (or so I've been told) who writes to you. I send thee this letter today to thank thee for providing such pleasures... it is what keeps me alive in this woundrous world._

_However, I have noticed you seem to think of me as...a demi-god of some sort. Which does not bother myself in any way. But I will tell you this: I never, ever expected to survive what I survived. I know I was fatally wounded in many battles, but let's face it, I am no sorcerer._

_And erm... may I just relate the embarrassing event in which I had to dress up as a lady... It is Queen Gwen who forced me into it! Besides, I managed to escape alive due to this trick and thus, later, saving Camelot. It was in for knight's honor that I did this; I can assure you this is not something I do every day. I am not a cosplayer either._

_Also, I have a passionate love for women; not men. (and most certainly not Gwaine)_

_Thank you for your attention,_

_Sir Leon, knight of Camelot._

**X**

"Guinevere, what does he mean by that?" Arthur asks, his eyebrow frowning. Gwen clears her throat, looking a little embarrassed.

"Well, er... I helped him escape. By dressing him as a... woman." She says, defeated.

Everyone stays silent, until Arthur and Gwaine burst in laughter.

"Oh my gosh! My little Leon, as a woman! I bet that was sexy!" Gwaine purs, and everyone stops laughing, a bit shocked. Gwaine does not seem to listen as his eyes sparkle, walking away.

Merlin appears very confused. "Wait- what?"

But so life goes on in Camelot.

* * *

Here goes Sir Leon! I don't know why I put the part with Gwaine (I never actually saw a Leon X Gwaine fanfic), but I figured everybody always pairs up all the characters with Gwaine, so... xD Anyways thank to everybody who reviewed! You rule! 8D Next chapter is Morgause! ^^

If you have time, please review! Always makes my day! ^^ -KittyRin.


	10. Morgause

I do not own Merlin, BBC does! (Thanks to konaha-leafsprite for pointing out some of the absurdity of this chapter... I've changed it now. ^^)

* * *

10. Morgause_  
_

_Dearest Fanfiction Writers,  
_

_It is I, Morgause Le Fay, head priestess of the Old Religon, and witch who practices dark magic. I have no time whatsoever on my hands to read your foolish stories, but from what I have heard from my followers, you have been writing foul, repugnant content that should be burned along with Uther Pendragon and all his descendants._

_I do care for my sister, Morgana, perhaps. But I have never really cared for anyone in my life, nor will I ever. I love no men; though I do know how to bewitch them with my lust so they will never fall out of love, and they shall be mine to command. This was the case with Cenred. He was just a fool, playing the role of my puppet._

_You may think I have a soft side for people like Merlin, because he has magic, or Arthur, because we technically share a half sister, but these are all lies. LIES, LIES, LIES! You hear me? LIES. They are nothing but stupid men, who shall soon be deceived. Mordred will ensure of Arthur's downfall, and I'll take care of Emrys. _

_We'll meet when I kill you,_

_Morgause Le Fay._

**X**

"What did she mean by the last comment? Who's _Mordred_?" Arthur scoffs, frowning.

Merlin shrugs. Of course, he _cannot_ tell Arthur that Mordred is a eight year old whose destiny is to kill him... He gulps. "Don't you remember? He's the little druid boy you saved."

Arthur gasps. "And now he's off to kill me? Some 'thank you' that is!"

Merlin just shrugs. Arthur clears his voice, scrutinizing the letter again.

"Merlin, what does Morgause mean by you possessing magic?" Arthur demands, his blue eyes piercing through Merlin's disguise. He gulps nervously.

"Oh I'm sure that-" he begins, until he gets cut off. A loud explosion resonates through the castle's walls.

"SOMEONE IS ATTACKING CAMELOT." A writer yells. Everyone just stares, their mouths wide open in aw.

Morgana steps in, laughing, as she throws around sleeping powder. "I know how to make an entrance!" She laughs. Everyone falls asleep, except Merlin of course who ends up kicking her out of the castle and sending her far, far, far away. Arthur ends up walking up, having forgotten everything that happened in the last hour (he hit his head when falling down). So Merlin continues to live in disguise.

* * *

So... I talked about Mordred because in the Arthurian legends, Mordred is supposed to be Morgause's child (in some tales, some say the father is Arthur o.O) and Mordred is the one who ends up murdering Arthur, though he, too, ends up dying. However, I really don't want to see this happening in the show... :( it would break my heart. Anyways please review! ^^ -KR.


	11. Percival

I do not own Merlin; BBC does.

* * *

11. Sir Percival

_Dearest Writers of Fanfiction,_

_This is Percival, knight of Camelot, who writes to you on this fine day. I am aware that I am illiterate, and because of that, I, sadly enough, cannot read any of your tales. _

_However, I do have my intermediate between the writing world and reality, Sir Leon, who has explained to me some of your plots. _

_I am a man of few words; and because of that, I will say this in just a few lines._

_I am a shy, sometimes insecure man who relies on his strength as a mean of communication. I know I may sound like some kind of save-the-world tough guy, but I really am not. I do not like harming what can be prevented to be hurt._

_I do not have relationships with the first woman (or man) that I meet. I do believe in the purity of matrimony, and I would kindly ask you to stop pairing me with everybody, especially my fellow knights. Please. _

_Yours truly,_

_Sir Percival._

_PS: don't ask me how I wrote this._

**X**

"Sir Percival, you never showed us this tender, caring side of you." Sir Leon says after reading the letter, as he puts an arm on the man's shoulder.

Sir Percival groans. He had _not_ expected his comrades to actually read this... "Oh well, you know me... just, doing what I do."

"Which is what exactly?" Sir Gwaine joins in. "Pick up the daisies and frolic in the meadows?" He smirks.

Sir Percival goes all red and runs away, embarrassed. The knights have a good laugh.

"Guys, quit teasing him. Sir Percival has a sensitive soul, that's all." Merlin affirms, knowing the feeling of being picked on.

"And how would you know about being sensitive... _oh wait_." Arthur smirks deviously. "WHO was it exactly that I caught stealing some of Morgana's _dresses_?"

Merlin wants to say that they were for Freya, but he refrains himself. Instead, he lets everybody else mock him for one good hour.

And so, life goes on.

* * *

Poor Merlin... at least, we all know his intentions were good. x) Thanks to everybody who reviewed last time! I'd like to say that the feeback you've been giving me and some of the characters you've suggested have really kept me going. Anyways, please review! Next one shall be Cenred.

-KittyRin


	12. Cenred

I do not own Merlin; BBC does.

* * *

_11. Cenred_

_Dearest Fanfiction Writers,_

_I've had enough of your stupid, deluded tales about me. You all take me for some sort of fool who gets tricked by good looks and such. Can I just clarify that this was never the case. I am a strong, self-centered man who does not hesitate or flinch when I murder a man. I've tortured, lynched, and I've created excruciating pain for my prisoners. I am not afraid of anyone._

_And I was not tricked by Morgause. I intended to invade Camelot anyways and my supreme plan was to eventually take Morgana's life so the throne would be mine. Morgause was a mere obstacle in my route and I never loved her. Yes, she was pretty. But I do not doubt half of the women on Earth, with a pretty dress and a little make up, could be pretty. Oh alright, so they don't all possess the same dangerous aura..._

_Anyways, to lay things clearly: I was not tricked. That wrench killed me and I will curse her to her grave!_

_Write anything about me again and you, too, will be cursed to your grave._

_Cenred_

**X_  
_**

Nobody takes Cenred's threat really seriously; he's just one of those villains who never really posed a threat.

"I think we should make a feast in honor of his death." Sir Leon suggests. "It shall be grand!"

Arthur shakes his head. "No need to be so cruel to the dead, even the evil ones."

Then, Merlin comes in, followed by Arthur's children who shout in every direction. Arthur sighs. "Merlin, I thought I told you to keep them calm."

"Well, may I just say it was before your son decided to become a musician and formed a musical group with your other two children."

Everybody stares at Merlin, not understand. "What?"

"Yeah, and they decided to make me lead vocalist..." Merlin groans. "And they're threatening of putting me in the stocks if I don't do it!"

Arthur laughs loudly. "Well then, do as they say! And be sure to invite me when you have your first concert!"

Everybody has a good laugh.

* * *

Oh dear, always Merlin. But hey, I can picture him rocking his heart out! :P Please review and the next one shall be... I actually haven't really decided xD Anyways. :)

-KittyRin


	13. Merlin

I've decided to stop here; as much as I liked this, I didn't have much inspiration for other characters. If I do happen to have more one day, I'll maybe continue this...

anyways I do not own Merlin! :D

* * *

13. Merlin

Dear Fanfiction Writers,

I would like to say hello to the whole community. Most know me as idiot, and few know me as Emrys. You have been such supporting people, and I cannot thank you enough. Although some of your tales have sometimes made me wonder whether you people are sane or not, I have enjoyed any adventure stories of yours. However, I did want to clarify few things:

- I am NOT your sassy gay friend no matter how much you want me to be.

- I am also not in love with Gwen, Gwaine, Lancelot, etc... OR ARTHUR!

- I realize that a lot ship Merthur, but I can assure you that we are nothing but comrades. He's my bro; not my hoe.

- You seem to enjoy stories where I happen to be a girl. No matter how... strange these may be, I will clarify: I am in fact, a man!

- I do not break the rules; I bend them. And I always do it in the name of peace.

- I also, sadly enough, do not spend my time in the tavern drinking with Gwaine.

So, thank you very much for your attention,

a very dizzy Merlin (excuse the out-character)

**X**

Morgana had put a spell on the castle, which meant that everything had gone the way the way writers had always wanted.

Now, Arthur and Merlin were happily married: Merlin had become Gwen's sassy gay friend who always helped her score points with all the knights in the realm, including Lancelot.

But the writers now regret this; they want to go back to the way it was before. Camelot the way it is currently is not the real Camelot. It's all an illusion.

So the community gathers on a fine afternoon, and use the powers of words to change the course of time, and destroy Morgana's spell. Everything, at once, goes back to normal. Gwen becomes Queen of Camelot, Mordred grows stronger and darker and well... Arthur and Merlin remain prat and idiot. They remain the side of two coins.

And so, as all good fairy tales end, _they lived happily ever after. _

* * *

Phew. So thanks a lot to XOnceEAgainX, AlwaysABrandNewDay, TheImpossiblePen and whitecrossgirl for reviewing! You guys have been super supportive. Thanks to the 30 who put this on their alert list and the 22 who put this on their favorites... you guys rule! :)

Which does remind me; if you liked this particular story, I've started something a little similar where the characters write to their past self. Feel free to check it out if you have the time! :)

-KittyRin


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